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By Sara Watkins

Content Warnings: Derealization/depersonalization.

Today, the tongue in my mouth felt like it was someone else’s tongue inside my mouth.

I bit it hard. I bit the shit out of it (just to test if it was really mine) and was scared to find the results were inconclusive. There wasn’t as much pain as there should have been. 

Then, I rubbed my arm, and it felt like someone else was rubbing someone else’s arm.

I lost all sense of direction and orientation and perspective underneath three blankets for hours, and I couldn’t even cry about it because I didn’t have any eyeballs.

Sara Watkins

Sara Watkins (she/her) is an editor, author, UCTD-haver, and editor-in-chief of Spoonie Press, which is devoted to publishing work by chronically ill, disabled, and neurodivergent creators. Her writing explores themes of disability and autonomy using wry surrealism and general weirdness to champion the idea that, despite our differences, we are not alone. She is the winner of the 2022 MASKS Literary Magazine Story Award. Recent publications include work in Wordgathering, Vast Chasm, and Bitchin’ Kitsch. Contact: or @saranadebooks on Twitter and Instagram.

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